This post has been floating in my brain for weeks, and I think it needs to come out now. When I was pregnant the first time, I read everything I could get my hands on, talked to everyone I could about what it was like having a baby, was up on the latest nursery decorations, thought I was very well prepared for what was coming. Haha... well, didn't expect 3 days of labour ending in a c-section, didn't expect a massive blood infection that floored me and kept me in the hospital for over 2 weeks, didn't expect my hubby (who is now my ex) to care so little for me during the labour nor during the infection, and finally, couldn't believe it when they handed my Tristan and wondered "Ok, now what?".
You would think I would learn... but I haven't. I did exactly the same thing for this "birth" that I did with Tristan. Read everything, talked to everyone, thought I was organized and ready for anything and everything. NOT! Alot of the trip, I kept saying to Greg... why didn't anyone tell me this or that? Even if someone had, I don't think I would have been prepared for what has been going on, just as the other families I met in Beijing were not ready for what they were going through. What exactly am I talking about? Well, I figure I should share this for other adoptive parents - take it or leave it, its up to you, but somehow I think it will make me feel better that I have shared this somehow:
1. Your child will be nothing like you expected.
2. Someone else's child may look like an angel compared to yours who is spewing congee in the restaurant, but you do not know what happens behind closed doors or in the most public places you can think of (think airport arrivals area in Beijing). Don't compare!
3. Stay calm, at peace... your child will pick up on it, and will calm down if they are panicked. If you have never changed a diaper, and are panicking... calm down, deep breath... you can do this, its been done a million times by a million parents with no one loosing any limbs.
4. Your emotions will be all over the place, to the point that you think you are going crazy sometimes. This (I think) is normal.
5. The jetlag on the way back is just brutal. Have family and friends available to help you during the day, to keep your sanity and keep you fed. That's about all you can hope for during that first 10 days or so.
6. Plan to be away from LIFE as you know it for at least an additional 2 weeks beyond your travel. (This applies to those that have kids all ready; if you have no kids yet... say goodbye to your LIFE as you know it now, get ready to redefine normal as you will find it again in about 18 yrs or so... maybe).
7. The stares you will get from people in China will make your DH want to get violent, even though there is not one violent bone in his body.
8. Practice putting and taking diapers off a child in every inconvenient spot you can think of - back of taxis, in the tailgate of a van, on an airplane seat, child standing up in a filthy bathroom. Do this over and over again, until you can do it with your eyes closed, on zero sleep, in under 10 seconds. You think this is funny... I'm not kidding.
9. Practice having a diaper bag ready by the door, with snacks, change of clothing, toys, diapers, wipes, bottle. Bring it with you whenever you go out - leave it in the car - and ask hubby to take one thing out from time to time, so that you get into the habit of knowing just by weight and shift what is missing and add it promptly.
10. Say good bye to sex with hubby. Well, ok.. temporarily, like for the next several months or so.
11. Meds: well, everyone has their own system for this so I'm going out on a limb here. Carry only 1 painkiller/fever reducer and salinex with you on your person. I prefer Motrin/Advil personally cause it lasts up to 8 hrs, but you are fine with Tempra. Salinex is every mother's godsend - use it at the first sign of sniffles, and you will avoid ear infections, and the like. You will thank me for this one.
12. Do not go and get your child's medicare card the first week you are back. Do not go until the Wednesday of the following week - it opens at 10 am, get there by 9:45 am and you will be done at 10:30 am. (If you don't take my advice, you will end up spending 2 hrs wasting your time waiting for nothing cause you will leave empty handed with a screaming and unhappy child).
13. The beds in China are rock hard - you will get used to them, but you will love your bed when you get home.
14. Locate the nearest Starbucks or Haagen Daz restaurants (yes, that's right ... an ice cream from heaven RESTAURANT). Go in case of home sickness, or if you want to see some North Americans from time to time. You will get nods of acknowledgments that will make things a bit easier.
15. Be proud of yourself for going to such a foreign country and making it back. (I'm not there yet... still a bit shell shocked).
16. Your child in China is not the same child you will live with at home.
17. Bring some good books to read and be prepared to read them in the most uncomfortable spots while your child sleeps at night or during nap time - bathroom, hallway just outside your room, closet (I kid you not... I needed light, and the closet light was the only light available).
18. Give yourself time to adjust and to fall in love with your child. Accept the fact that it may happen quickly or not for a while... either way, its the right pace for you and her.
19. People will say all sorts of lovely things to you about what wonderful people you are to adopt a child. You can correct them and say something to the effect that its actually a selfish thing on your part cause you wanted this child for xyz reasons. Be prepared for the "are you growing a third head on your shoulder" look - people who do not adopt don't get it, and you can't change the world to make them understand what you have gone through to get your child.
20. Relax, don't sweat the small stuff. Your child will in fact be able to eat by themselves and brush their own teeth by the age of 18 yrs. And you will, one day, be able to have a good night's sleep.
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Saturday, November 24, 2007
1 week home all ready
Time goes so slowly, then seems to go so fast. Its all ready been one week at home with the K, and it seems almost like forever. I got a bit of break today, running around by myself this way and that way - shopping at Walmart at 9:30 am with the parking lot FULL, hockey practice for the boys, grocery shopping, skate sharpening, visit from our friend Ernest - which helped me to re-tune myself. Skating tomorrow morning will also do me a world of good.
This week has been basically one of trying to rest and not exert too much effort in any one thing, but pacing myself and pacing Kaitlynn. Where she hated the playroom, she loves it as long as one of her brothers is in there with her; where she was terrified of the dog, she came up and petted his behind this morning, while Jacob was doing the same thing; where she had never seen snow, she became quite intimate with it this morning by falling over twice head first into it... damn boots, how can anyone stand in those things, let alone walk in them! She continues to eat just about everything we put in front of her, except ice cream (go figure) - I try to make at least one thing that would be for her comfort food (congee, noodles, dumplings, fried pork in pineapple) and that seems to be a nice balance for her. She is very smart - all ready saying "TERMINER" when she has eaten everything in her plate, "Beau chien Zorro" (mommy brainwashing her to believe that Zorro isn't so bad), and the standard auto, velo, camion, bus from Beijing. She is quite literally a sponge, and repeats everything we say. Her gross motor skills are getting better too - she is working on pulling herself up from lying down, just using her abs, she hops around like a bunny, and the stairs are still wobbly but she does like doing them.
I have a hilarious video of the kids which I will figure out how to post soon, so for now... good bye first week, I can hardly wait to see what week 2 holds for us all.
This week has been basically one of trying to rest and not exert too much effort in any one thing, but pacing myself and pacing Kaitlynn. Where she hated the playroom, she loves it as long as one of her brothers is in there with her; where she was terrified of the dog, she came up and petted his behind this morning, while Jacob was doing the same thing; where she had never seen snow, she became quite intimate with it this morning by falling over twice head first into it... damn boots, how can anyone stand in those things, let alone walk in them! She continues to eat just about everything we put in front of her, except ice cream (go figure) - I try to make at least one thing that would be for her comfort food (congee, noodles, dumplings, fried pork in pineapple) and that seems to be a nice balance for her. She is very smart - all ready saying "TERMINER" when she has eaten everything in her plate, "Beau chien Zorro" (mommy brainwashing her to believe that Zorro isn't so bad), and the standard auto, velo, camion, bus from Beijing. She is quite literally a sponge, and repeats everything we say. Her gross motor skills are getting better too - she is working on pulling herself up from lying down, just using her abs, she hops around like a bunny, and the stairs are still wobbly but she does like doing them.
I have a hilarious video of the kids which I will figure out how to post soon, so for now... good bye first week, I can hardly wait to see what week 2 holds for us all.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
More random pics
Sorry folks, but I am too tired to post much but I will put up some photos to give you an idea of our little adventure. Kaitlynn is slowly settling in, loves her brothers to bits and vice versa, while I try to recover from jetlag that includes nausea from 7 am - 7 pm.. not a good scene for me right now.
A little boy who followed us along while we visited the Park in Beijing. He was quite the character!
Seniors keeping nimble - writing with sponges and water.
Seniors getting together for a jam session.
This flamboyant lady, dancing away to 50's hits made me think of my Mom - carefree and just giving to the groove.
A lovely final scene from the park in Beijing.
Arrival of Leanne and Tao Tao at the airport. We think that the Tao and the Princess look like brother and sister. The boys were all smitten.
Three monkeys hanging out at the airport, waiting for Maman and the K.
A little boy who followed us along while we visited the Park in Beijing. He was quite the character!
Seniors keeping nimble - writing with sponges and water.
Seniors getting together for a jam session.
This flamboyant lady, dancing away to 50's hits made me think of my Mom - carefree and just giving to the groove.
A lovely final scene from the park in Beijing.
Arrival of Leanne and Tao Tao at the airport. We think that the Tao and the Princess look like brother and sister. The boys were all smitten.
Three monkeys hanging out at the airport, waiting for Maman and the K.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Sleepless in Montreal
Well, its hit - the jetlag is just terrible. I think I have slept all of 1 hour tonight, and all I keep thinking is today is going to be hell as DH is back at work today and I will be with the K all day alone without a sane adult around. K by the way was up from about midnight till 3ish, playing quietly in her crib. Then she finally went to sleep but by that time I was wide awake with no possibility for falling asleep.
Finally, here are some pics from the trip:
Daddy's Gotcha moment
Finally, here are some pics from the trip:
Daddy's Gotcha moment
Posing for the camera, all in pink!
About to scale the Great Wall... you aren't a man, supposedly, until you have scaled it.
I guess K and I are now men!
I guess K and I are now men!
Cheeerio break
Summer palace.. in the rain.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Well this is it...
About to go for our last dinner in Beijing. Almost all packed, and so ready to head home. Not looking forward to the flight, but as its the only way to get her home to her brothers there is no point in complaining about it. I wanted to travel light, but its just not happening for me - I wanted one backpack, but now I have mine and her's full of the stuff that she absolutely needs on a 12+ hr flight.
I am very tired, very much ready to see all your faces and to get some news (I can't see my blog nor the comments left), and to breath in the crisp Montreal air again. Beijing has been interesting, and thanks to my guide she found just the right mix of things for us to do. We went to a park today and just walked around, listening to the birds singing, the older folk dancing away in the middle of the square, watched little kids run around with bums showing, and just got some sun onto our faces. It was a good way to put an end to this adventure. I believe this is the hardest thing I have done, after Jacob's birth, and while words swirl in my head at night when I sit in front of the computer nothing comes out. I will feel better once I am at home, so till then, hang tight everyone ... I'm sorry I can't write more, but I am just completely drained and need to get the little one some food and to bed.
From China, this is the S&K show signing off. Zaijian!
I am very tired, very much ready to see all your faces and to get some news (I can't see my blog nor the comments left), and to breath in the crisp Montreal air again. Beijing has been interesting, and thanks to my guide she found just the right mix of things for us to do. We went to a park today and just walked around, listening to the birds singing, the older folk dancing away in the middle of the square, watched little kids run around with bums showing, and just got some sun onto our faces. It was a good way to put an end to this adventure. I believe this is the hardest thing I have done, after Jacob's birth, and while words swirl in my head at night when I sit in front of the computer nothing comes out. I will feel better once I am at home, so till then, hang tight everyone ... I'm sorry I can't write more, but I am just completely drained and need to get the little one some food and to bed.
From China, this is the S&K show signing off. Zaijian!
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
I'm blogging, I'm blogging!
Well, it's finally come to this. The homebound husband is blogging. Yep, another first on this fortnight of many firsts.
Stefanie has asked me to say that she misses everyone terribly, and she's sorry she hasn't posted or emailed but she's been very busy. Since the last post, the doctor has been seen (nothing untoward found!), documentation has been delivered to the embassy, much tea has been drunk, and the Great Wall has been scaled.
On the medical side of things, little Miss 'Anmei measures 88cm long (in the 50th percentile) and 13kg (in the 75th percentile) and is quite healthy. The doctor told Stefanie that with the type of cleft she has, she can be prone to heart murmurs, but none were heard. We are all very relieved!
And our little girl is just full of surprises. She has started repeating Mama's french ("velo", "auto", for example) and, most amazingly "Kaitlynn 'Anmei"!
Stefanie told me of how when they started climbing the Great Wall, their guide stopped at the first tower, but Mama and 'Anmei kept on going. They were past the second tower and halfway up toward the third when Mama had put on the brakes and make a very determined little girl turn around and head back down. A quick study and strong willed. Are we ever in trouble...
After delivering documentation at the embassy yesterday, they went to a tea ceremony and sampled many, many teas. Unfortunately, as old age creeps up on me, the first thing to go is my memory, so you'll have to forgive me if I can't relate the details of which types of teas they tasted. Let's just say that Stef enjoyed herself immensely.
Now, on to the most important things: photos! Yep, Baba brought home the digital camera card and downloaded the photos from the first week to the computer. So, without further delay, here goes.
The first picture of Mama and daughter:
Mama sure knows how to dress her little girl:
'Anmei and Baba after climbing a long series of stairs up toward Dr. Sun Yat-sen's Memorial in Nanjing. Notice the spring in her step!
Mama, 'Anmei, and our Nanjing guide, Juliette, near the entrance to Confucious' Temple:
And finally a few photos we received from the orphanage director, showing 'Anmei with some of her friends. (Sorry for their blurry nature, but they are photos of photos. The originals are still with Stef in Beijing.)
Well, I think that's about enough for now. I don't want to exert myself too much the first time out. :-) And jetlag still has a firm grip on my sleeping patterns, so I should start thinking about getting some sleep (although thinking about sleeping and actually getting some sleep are two completely different concepts for me right now).
Needless to say, we are all anxiously waiting for a very special homecoming. As we say at home, "juste 4 do-dos" (and actually only 3 more, for those in Beijing and already in the middle of a Wednesday morning).
Greg
Stefanie has asked me to say that she misses everyone terribly, and she's sorry she hasn't posted or emailed but she's been very busy. Since the last post, the doctor has been seen (nothing untoward found!), documentation has been delivered to the embassy, much tea has been drunk, and the Great Wall has been scaled.
On the medical side of things, little Miss 'Anmei measures 88cm long (in the 50th percentile) and 13kg (in the 75th percentile) and is quite healthy. The doctor told Stefanie that with the type of cleft she has, she can be prone to heart murmurs, but none were heard. We are all very relieved!
And our little girl is just full of surprises. She has started repeating Mama's french ("velo", "auto", for example) and, most amazingly "Kaitlynn 'Anmei"!
Stefanie told me of how when they started climbing the Great Wall, their guide stopped at the first tower, but Mama and 'Anmei kept on going. They were past the second tower and halfway up toward the third when Mama had put on the brakes and make a very determined little girl turn around and head back down. A quick study and strong willed. Are we ever in trouble...
After delivering documentation at the embassy yesterday, they went to a tea ceremony and sampled many, many teas. Unfortunately, as old age creeps up on me, the first thing to go is my memory, so you'll have to forgive me if I can't relate the details of which types of teas they tasted. Let's just say that Stef enjoyed herself immensely.
Now, on to the most important things: photos! Yep, Baba brought home the digital camera card and downloaded the photos from the first week to the computer. So, without further delay, here goes.
The first picture of Mama and daughter:
Mama sure knows how to dress her little girl:
'Anmei and Baba after climbing a long series of stairs up toward Dr. Sun Yat-sen's Memorial in Nanjing. Notice the spring in her step!
Mama, 'Anmei, and our Nanjing guide, Juliette, near the entrance to Confucious' Temple:
And finally a few photos we received from the orphanage director, showing 'Anmei with some of her friends. (Sorry for their blurry nature, but they are photos of photos. The originals are still with Stef in Beijing.)
Well, I think that's about enough for now. I don't want to exert myself too much the first time out. :-) And jetlag still has a firm grip on my sleeping patterns, so I should start thinking about getting some sleep (although thinking about sleeping and actually getting some sleep are two completely different concepts for me right now).Needless to say, we are all anxiously waiting for a very special homecoming. As we say at home, "juste 4 do-dos" (and actually only 3 more, for those in Beijing and already in the middle of a Wednesday morning).
Greg
Sunday, November 11, 2007
A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step
Actual Post Time: 3:30 pm, Beijing
And I think I am step 2 now! DH just left to return home (Mom, the cavalry is on the way!) amongst many, many tears... and not from my Kaitlynn as she was fast asleep. I was quite beside myself upon his departure, and I using this blog to get myself out of this funk. Fear of the unknown is powerful, and seems to consume me these days. So bear with me while I cope.
We left Nanjing on Saturday, again with tears as we were leaving our wonderful guide Juliette. She was a joy the whole time and it was difficult to say Zaijian. The plane trip, shall we say, was a challenge. Kaitlynn has emerged from her shell and decided to get mad at Mama in the Beijing airport, and get mad at Baba in the washroom at thousands of feet over China, while he tried to change her soaked diaper and clothing (note to self, always change a diaper BEFORE you get on the plane!). Baba just got high pitched screaming where I got hitting and struggling and kicking. Very hard time, but I am glad that it has happened and we are now able to move on... I think. We were greated by our new guide, Raphaelle, who is bright and organized and cheery. We got wisked to our amazing hotel, which makes our hotel in Nanjing pale in comparaison. We finally gave in and ate Mcdonald's for the first time - Kaitlynn loves french fries!- and put her to bed at 6 pm and we were out by 7 pm, till 5ish this morning. The day was spent quietly, eating brunch, walking outside and getting ready for DH's departure.
As I said, Kaitlynn has been a joy - still quiet, but loves to play, eat, sleep (hot damn! seeing some other parents around us, we realize how lucky we are that we can get 10+ hrs of sleep if we want or need!) and be tickled! It was heartbreaking to watch her get so mad at me, but I held strong and spoke softly to her and held her till it passed.
This week hopefully will pass quickly as I miss DH horribly all ready. I miss my boys even more and can't believe how my heart is torn into pieces - one piece in China and the other back home.
And I think I am step 2 now! DH just left to return home (Mom, the cavalry is on the way!) amongst many, many tears... and not from my Kaitlynn as she was fast asleep. I was quite beside myself upon his departure, and I using this blog to get myself out of this funk. Fear of the unknown is powerful, and seems to consume me these days. So bear with me while I cope.
We left Nanjing on Saturday, again with tears as we were leaving our wonderful guide Juliette. She was a joy the whole time and it was difficult to say Zaijian. The plane trip, shall we say, was a challenge. Kaitlynn has emerged from her shell and decided to get mad at Mama in the Beijing airport, and get mad at Baba in the washroom at thousands of feet over China, while he tried to change her soaked diaper and clothing (note to self, always change a diaper BEFORE you get on the plane!). Baba just got high pitched screaming where I got hitting and struggling and kicking. Very hard time, but I am glad that it has happened and we are now able to move on... I think. We were greated by our new guide, Raphaelle, who is bright and organized and cheery. We got wisked to our amazing hotel, which makes our hotel in Nanjing pale in comparaison. We finally gave in and ate Mcdonald's for the first time - Kaitlynn loves french fries!- and put her to bed at 6 pm and we were out by 7 pm, till 5ish this morning. The day was spent quietly, eating brunch, walking outside and getting ready for DH's departure.
As I said, Kaitlynn has been a joy - still quiet, but loves to play, eat, sleep (hot damn! seeing some other parents around us, we realize how lucky we are that we can get 10+ hrs of sleep if we want or need!) and be tickled! It was heartbreaking to watch her get so mad at me, but I held strong and spoke softly to her and held her till it passed.
This week hopefully will pass quickly as I miss DH horribly all ready. I miss my boys even more and can't believe how my heart is torn into pieces - one piece in China and the other back home.
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Last day in Nanjing
Actual Time: 9:30 am Friday morning, Nanjing
What a beautiful child we have! She is a dream and a half. Calm, quiet, loves to play, loves her baba big time, giggle monster who loves to be tickled, loves to eat (oh my... time to get a third fridge, me thinks!), does not wake up well from naps and needs to slowly greet the day while looking at photos from the orphanage. Her sadess time is in the morning when she first wakes up, and sees us. We think she misses her friends horribly and so I have started giving her the photos of the orphanage staff and friends, and within 5 minutes she is telling us about the exploits with her and Mingxi - they seem to have been quite the couple! She loves wearing pretty things, and I have of course been obliging her :o) Our lovely guide Juliette exclaims every morning how beautiful Anmei is and you should see the lovely smile that comes across her face when she hears it. Baths are going well, and her skin and hair are lovely and soft - she has extremely thick hair, and our guide Juliette has exclaimed at how shiny it is. She smells like a baby, with the pudgy folds of a well loved child. The orphanage obviously treated her with love and kindness, and taught her many things (we often hear her singing nursery songs, counting to 5 in Mandarin and just jabbering away with much seriousness!).
We unfortunately could not visit the orphanage, nor her finding place. It seems that the orphanage is moving and that the road to it is under construction and hence its very difficult to get to it. The staff did take a full camera of pictures and reassured us that it would give us a good idea of what the orphanage was like and be a good keepsake for Kaitlynn. They did invite us back for a future visit.
On the flip side, the pollution is so thick here its constricting. We went into the mountains yesterday (Mausoleum) and what a good thing that was to do. The cold weather has arrived and you would thing that would help the pollution lift, but it actually makes it stay. There is a constant haze now, that blocks the sun - think of Blade Runner and you have a good idea of what the future holds for this lovely city... so sad.
The people are very curious about us, but they keep their distance. I am quite the center of the looks and some days its a bit harder than others. I am glad I brought my sunglasses to cover my eyes and give me some privacy!
We are a bit sad to be leaving Nanjing, one reason being that we must leave our lovely guide behind, Juliette (BTW, Leanne, Juliette extends a "Gros Bonjour" your way and speaks often of Taotao's exploits and his lovely and infectious disposition). She must stay in Nanjing to greet another family that arrives Saturday, and we fly off to Beijing having all the necessary paperwork done and in our hands. Like I said, Juliette is a joy to be with and she has taken us to a variety of lovely restaurants that have helped my poor stomach calm down. We have discovered the real Nanjing thanks to her, and she has brought Anmei out of herself on a couple of occasions... how special Juliette is, words fail me. We will miss her horribly when we set off tomorrow.
What a beautiful child we have! She is a dream and a half. Calm, quiet, loves to play, loves her baba big time, giggle monster who loves to be tickled, loves to eat (oh my... time to get a third fridge, me thinks!), does not wake up well from naps and needs to slowly greet the day while looking at photos from the orphanage. Her sadess time is in the morning when she first wakes up, and sees us. We think she misses her friends horribly and so I have started giving her the photos of the orphanage staff and friends, and within 5 minutes she is telling us about the exploits with her and Mingxi - they seem to have been quite the couple! She loves wearing pretty things, and I have of course been obliging her :o) Our lovely guide Juliette exclaims every morning how beautiful Anmei is and you should see the lovely smile that comes across her face when she hears it. Baths are going well, and her skin and hair are lovely and soft - she has extremely thick hair, and our guide Juliette has exclaimed at how shiny it is. She smells like a baby, with the pudgy folds of a well loved child. The orphanage obviously treated her with love and kindness, and taught her many things (we often hear her singing nursery songs, counting to 5 in Mandarin and just jabbering away with much seriousness!).
We unfortunately could not visit the orphanage, nor her finding place. It seems that the orphanage is moving and that the road to it is under construction and hence its very difficult to get to it. The staff did take a full camera of pictures and reassured us that it would give us a good idea of what the orphanage was like and be a good keepsake for Kaitlynn. They did invite us back for a future visit.
On the flip side, the pollution is so thick here its constricting. We went into the mountains yesterday (Mausoleum) and what a good thing that was to do. The cold weather has arrived and you would thing that would help the pollution lift, but it actually makes it stay. There is a constant haze now, that blocks the sun - think of Blade Runner and you have a good idea of what the future holds for this lovely city... so sad.
The people are very curious about us, but they keep their distance. I am quite the center of the looks and some days its a bit harder than others. I am glad I brought my sunglasses to cover my eyes and give me some privacy!
We are a bit sad to be leaving Nanjing, one reason being that we must leave our lovely guide behind, Juliette (BTW, Leanne, Juliette extends a "Gros Bonjour" your way and speaks often of Taotao's exploits and his lovely and infectious disposition). She must stay in Nanjing to greet another family that arrives Saturday, and we fly off to Beijing having all the necessary paperwork done and in our hands. Like I said, Juliette is a joy to be with and she has taken us to a variety of lovely restaurants that have helped my poor stomach calm down. We have discovered the real Nanjing thanks to her, and she has brought Anmei out of herself on a couple of occasions... how special Juliette is, words fail me. We will miss her horribly when we set off tomorrow.
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Postcard from China
I talked to the little family in Nanjing tonight. At times it was hard to decipher what was being said to me because of the joyful noise Chunmei was making in the background, bubbling and chirping away. They had just come back to their room after eating breakfast downstairs and were heading out to tend to legal matters, according to daddy.
Stefanie asked if I would pass on a few current bits of information as there have been technical issues accessing the internet for nearly 48hrs.
They spoke of feeling blessed that Chunmei is healthy, intelligent, beautiful and such an easy-going baby. Stefanie and her St. Greg are actually able to greet the day in a leisurely, civil fashion, drinking coffee and showering because Chunmei takes an hour to wake up!
Monday they went shopping for shoes but found only one pair that almost fit her, an EU size 24 while Stefanie thinks she is more likely a 23, Cdn 6.5 or 7. Somehow they heard that we had a major winter storm here today, as reports were that 35" fell on Massachusetts, so a worried mommy wants me to go out and buy little winter boots. I don't even have time to check the weather these days. I think I would have noticed 35".
They have taken some wonderful photos which they will have to post from home. One photo she especially likes shows the orphanage director posed with two nannies holding Chunmei, and Mingxi, who is also doing well.
Tuesday the little group went to the Confucious temple to play in a park and mingle with everyday Chinese, relaxing and enjoying their wonderful, natural spaces. The hotel where they are staying is in a livelier, more upscale commercial district.
Stefanie's tummy has been something of a challenge and she is guessing the fishy smells that seem to abound are sparking her seafood allergy; however, she wisely chose to pack oatmeal in her luggage so looks to her comfort food of choice to keep the inner turbulence under control.
So, now you're up to date. *smile*
Stefanie's mom
Stefanie asked if I would pass on a few current bits of information as there have been technical issues accessing the internet for nearly 48hrs.
They spoke of feeling blessed that Chunmei is healthy, intelligent, beautiful and such an easy-going baby. Stefanie and her St. Greg are actually able to greet the day in a leisurely, civil fashion, drinking coffee and showering because Chunmei takes an hour to wake up!
Monday they went shopping for shoes but found only one pair that almost fit her, an EU size 24 while Stefanie thinks she is more likely a 23, Cdn 6.5 or 7. Somehow they heard that we had a major winter storm here today, as reports were that 35" fell on Massachusetts, so a worried mommy wants me to go out and buy little winter boots. I don't even have time to check the weather these days. I think I would have noticed 35".
They have taken some wonderful photos which they will have to post from home. One photo she especially likes shows the orphanage director posed with two nannies holding Chunmei, and Mingxi, who is also doing well.
Tuesday the little group went to the Confucious temple to play in a park and mingle with everyday Chinese, relaxing and enjoying their wonderful, natural spaces. The hotel where they are staying is in a livelier, more upscale commercial district.
Stefanie's tummy has been something of a challenge and she is guessing the fishy smells that seem to abound are sparking her seafood allergy; however, she wisely chose to pack oatmeal in her luggage so looks to her comfort food of choice to keep the inner turbulence under control.
So, now you're up to date. *smile*
Stefanie's mom
Hush, now....
I see a light in the sky
Oh, it's almost blinding me
I can't believe
I've been touched by an angel with love
Oh, it's almost blinding me
I can't believe
I've been touched by an angel with love
~c.dion
Monday, November 5, 2007
She's Got Us!
Actul Post Time: November 5 2007 8 pm, Nanjing Time
WHAT A DAY THIS HAS BEEN! I so wish we could figure out how to get pictures on line for you all to see this little (hmpf) munchkin, who is now our daughter.... she is just wonderful, to put it mildly. I will recap the day's events first:
We woke up at about 6:30 am, before the 7 am alarm (!). I slept really well last night, thanks to the Melatonin, but DH didn't this time. We were so jazzed to get up and go that we were ready about 45 minutes before we had to leave. Our wonderful guide, Juliette, met us at 9:30 am while trying to get a hold of our driver... who was sleeping in the bus, in front of the hotel. It was slightly comical, as he raced around half awake getting us into his bus (its more a minivan, but they call it a bus). We then sped off from the hotel, dashing through insane traffic (DH called it The Chaos theory: there is order in the chaos, we just can't see it! As a mathematician, who has studied Chaos theory, I loved his analogy, especially coming from a physicist... they all believe, my DH included, that physics is THE science to study, not math... but I digress into an ongoing argument between us). 15 minutes into this drive through Nanjing streets, Juliette on the phone with this person and that person (the kids had arrived!), the driver driving franctically while calling this person and that person on his cell phone, the driver jumps out of our bus and starts talking to a cabby. Juliette finally confirms that the driver is lost and does not know how to take us to Civil Affairs. Ahhhhhh, lovely... the mantra that Formons has taught us came in handy "Stay calm, be pleasant and patient." Over four lanes of heavy traffic, our driver does a U turn, heads back the way we came and then somehow gets us to where we have to go and I have no clue how he did it. Juliette in the meantime is pointing out how beautiful some of the trees are. The driver then tries to pull up to the entrance, but the guy in charge of parking stands in front of our bus and they start arguing. Our driver says something to the effect of "in your face, I am going forward" and continues forward until he drops us off at the door (the parking guy is fine, he got out of the way.. eventually).
We jump out of the bus, grap our stuff and follow Juliette inside. She then turns left very quickly and then walks into this office, and there is Kaitlynn Chunmei (with a friend)! Oh my, oh my... here we thought we had to sign this and that paper and then we would see our daughter, but no, here she was. I immediately got down to 2 yr old level (on my knees), and started saying "Ni hao, ni hao Chunmei" and she just looked at me with those beautiful brown eyes. The nanny with her got her to say "Ni hao mama" and then grap my fingers. She then said "Ni hao baba". She then backed away, a little scared of what she had just done (poor baby). The nanny then distracted her by breaking into song and dance, which put a big smile on her face. The rest is a bit of blur for me, but somehow she ended up glued to DH and refused to go to anyone else for over 2 hours, and this during our picture taking too ( she was not pleased with this in the least). We got a chance to meet the Orphanage Director, the Maitren of the nanny's and one of the two nanny's who looked after Chunmei. We presented our gifts to everyone, and got "Thank You" from them all (in English). Thank Heaven's I had extra ones, cause I didn't expect so many people! We got a chance to ask a few questions (is she potty trained? Yes, but she wears a diaper, and we are supposed to ask her every hour if she has to go... to which DH queried, how are we supposed to ask her?, what does she eat? everything... more on this later, does she nap? yes after lunch... then it was broken off and explained that we would have a chance to ask more questions tomorrow).
Headed back to the hotel, which was a complete blur. In the room, she clung to DH for at least 2 hours, and then slowly, ever so slowly, she started to play. Then she sat with me and let me hold her and feed her. She was in three layers, and we wanted to get her cooled down - not something she wanted to do, but we finally got the sweater off, and then when she understood that she could hold it, she relaxed. We then got the other two layers off, which were drenched in sweat (poor thing) and into some PINK PJ's.. which she could not get over. She kept looking at the clasps and then at her tummy! She then played quietly, immitating things I would do, but not saying a word. Oh, I should explain that the nanny told Juliette that Chunmei (or Anmei, as she was called in the orphanage) is very outgoing and full of life which we were not seeing. So, then Juliette come over to our room at 3 pm, and started playing with her... and we saw the real Chunmei burst out! What a character she has - I told you Colette, I saw character in her visa pics... she has tonnes of it. She giggles when you tickle her, and lets out these big guffaws when she does something funny. She is stacking sponges now perfectly, as she figured out that if she squeeshes them together they stay put. She loves books, and asks all sorts of questions about what is pictured. She can say Zorro's name when she sees his pictures! We are working on the boys names.
We went down for the buffet dinner, and boy does she eat well. So we have eat, poop (yes, she pooped... and the hardware is the required kind for HER!), and now she is asleep! She is devine, sturdy (she must weigh over 30 lbs.. 24 mths clothing "just" fits, I would get her more 2 or even 3's - no news on shoes yet - she has on a pair that says "25", but I think they are too big for her - I saw a pair of magic dancing shoes yesterday, which are pink and sparkly all over that we will go and get tomorrow afternoon), a joy, intelligent, funny, loves her daddy very much, and just wonders at me. The nannies have prepared her well for her new life - she all ready calls us mama and baba, anmei ma which I believe means we are hers... we certainly are!
I am in seventh heaven... and DH is fast asleep :o)
WHAT A DAY THIS HAS BEEN! I so wish we could figure out how to get pictures on line for you all to see this little (hmpf) munchkin, who is now our daughter.... she is just wonderful, to put it mildly. I will recap the day's events first:
We woke up at about 6:30 am, before the 7 am alarm (!). I slept really well last night, thanks to the Melatonin, but DH didn't this time. We were so jazzed to get up and go that we were ready about 45 minutes before we had to leave. Our wonderful guide, Juliette, met us at 9:30 am while trying to get a hold of our driver... who was sleeping in the bus, in front of the hotel. It was slightly comical, as he raced around half awake getting us into his bus (its more a minivan, but they call it a bus). We then sped off from the hotel, dashing through insane traffic (DH called it The Chaos theory: there is order in the chaos, we just can't see it! As a mathematician, who has studied Chaos theory, I loved his analogy, especially coming from a physicist... they all believe, my DH included, that physics is THE science to study, not math... but I digress into an ongoing argument between us). 15 minutes into this drive through Nanjing streets, Juliette on the phone with this person and that person (the kids had arrived!), the driver driving franctically while calling this person and that person on his cell phone, the driver jumps out of our bus and starts talking to a cabby. Juliette finally confirms that the driver is lost and does not know how to take us to Civil Affairs. Ahhhhhh, lovely... the mantra that Formons has taught us came in handy "Stay calm, be pleasant and patient." Over four lanes of heavy traffic, our driver does a U turn, heads back the way we came and then somehow gets us to where we have to go and I have no clue how he did it. Juliette in the meantime is pointing out how beautiful some of the trees are. The driver then tries to pull up to the entrance, but the guy in charge of parking stands in front of our bus and they start arguing. Our driver says something to the effect of "in your face, I am going forward" and continues forward until he drops us off at the door (the parking guy is fine, he got out of the way.. eventually).
We jump out of the bus, grap our stuff and follow Juliette inside. She then turns left very quickly and then walks into this office, and there is Kaitlynn Chunmei (with a friend)! Oh my, oh my... here we thought we had to sign this and that paper and then we would see our daughter, but no, here she was. I immediately got down to 2 yr old level (on my knees), and started saying "Ni hao, ni hao Chunmei" and she just looked at me with those beautiful brown eyes. The nanny with her got her to say "Ni hao mama" and then grap my fingers. She then said "Ni hao baba". She then backed away, a little scared of what she had just done (poor baby). The nanny then distracted her by breaking into song and dance, which put a big smile on her face. The rest is a bit of blur for me, but somehow she ended up glued to DH and refused to go to anyone else for over 2 hours, and this during our picture taking too ( she was not pleased with this in the least). We got a chance to meet the Orphanage Director, the Maitren of the nanny's and one of the two nanny's who looked after Chunmei. We presented our gifts to everyone, and got "Thank You" from them all (in English). Thank Heaven's I had extra ones, cause I didn't expect so many people! We got a chance to ask a few questions (is she potty trained? Yes, but she wears a diaper, and we are supposed to ask her every hour if she has to go... to which DH queried, how are we supposed to ask her?, what does she eat? everything... more on this later, does she nap? yes after lunch... then it was broken off and explained that we would have a chance to ask more questions tomorrow).
Headed back to the hotel, which was a complete blur. In the room, she clung to DH for at least 2 hours, and then slowly, ever so slowly, she started to play. Then she sat with me and let me hold her and feed her. She was in three layers, and we wanted to get her cooled down - not something she wanted to do, but we finally got the sweater off, and then when she understood that she could hold it, she relaxed. We then got the other two layers off, which were drenched in sweat (poor thing) and into some PINK PJ's.. which she could not get over. She kept looking at the clasps and then at her tummy! She then played quietly, immitating things I would do, but not saying a word. Oh, I should explain that the nanny told Juliette that Chunmei (or Anmei, as she was called in the orphanage) is very outgoing and full of life which we were not seeing. So, then Juliette come over to our room at 3 pm, and started playing with her... and we saw the real Chunmei burst out! What a character she has - I told you Colette, I saw character in her visa pics... she has tonnes of it. She giggles when you tickle her, and lets out these big guffaws when she does something funny. She is stacking sponges now perfectly, as she figured out that if she squeeshes them together they stay put. She loves books, and asks all sorts of questions about what is pictured. She can say Zorro's name when she sees his pictures! We are working on the boys names.
We went down for the buffet dinner, and boy does she eat well. So we have eat, poop (yes, she pooped... and the hardware is the required kind for HER!), and now she is asleep! She is devine, sturdy (she must weigh over 30 lbs.. 24 mths clothing "just" fits, I would get her more 2 or even 3's - no news on shoes yet - she has on a pair that says "25", but I think they are too big for her - I saw a pair of magic dancing shoes yesterday, which are pink and sparkly all over that we will go and get tomorrow afternoon), a joy, intelligent, funny, loves her daddy very much, and just wonders at me. The nannies have prepared her well for her new life - she all ready calls us mama and baba, anmei ma which I believe means we are hers... we certainly are!
I am in seventh heaven... and DH is fast asleep :o)
Sunday, November 4, 2007
Adrift in a Broken Time Zone
I was just about to post my message below when I noted a first report from the road! I could re-write but I have an early morning so I'll leave it as is, redundancy and all.
They arrived in Nanjing Friday exhausted but exhilarated, dropped their luggage and called immediately to reassure themselves that we were all well They reported that it had been a long, draggy flight broken up by 5 hours standing first on one foot, then the other in the Beijing airport. The adrenaline that had kept them ticking away through their final days at work, final re-packing and weighing challenges, as well as the demands of Hallowe'en (Stefanie commented, “Yup, that's all that was missing.”) had by now left them and with assurance from me that we are alive and happy, they were ready to lie down and sleep.
Unfortunately for all of us, most of the first conversation was taken up addressing a computer issue. Think of it: on the other side of the world and at considerable expense, Greg invoked his trouble-shooting skills so we could all communicate. I've not used a Mac since '85 and everything looks different from my PC at home. This was much bigger issue, however. It was a network gone wonky.
This morning as we enjoying a raucous breakfast preparing for several over-lapping hockey games, the second call came: Stefanie and St. Greg (you saw those randomly placed polka dots, right?) had walked around the main streets near their Nanjing hotel and both had slept for 13hrs-plus, They were beginning to feel ready for the next phase. There was a possibility that today could have been Kaitlynn's “Gothca' Day,” however I have not heard from them so cannot confirm. Perhaps they are just too busy holding their little daughter close, to write.
The three boyos are very active. I didn't have any boys so these past few days have been, ...erm, life in some parallel universe? Though I know downtown Montreal well, the South Shore is uncharted territory. I got lost the first day going to and from the Space Agency where the baby stays most days and, furthermore, it takes much longer to do anything in a large, cosmopolitan city. Garbage is separated into different piles from where I live. Remember all those packing materials from the last shopping trips to Ikea? And the water taps are reversed, as they could be in Australia so I take particular care starting the hot water to bathe the guys.
Does anyone know if Zorro is allowed to sleep on the sofa or where the bathing suits are for our early morning lesson tomorrow? I'd be grateful to hear from you.
Stefanie's mom
They arrived in Nanjing Friday exhausted but exhilarated, dropped their luggage and called immediately to reassure themselves that we were all well They reported that it had been a long, draggy flight broken up by 5 hours standing first on one foot, then the other in the Beijing airport. The adrenaline that had kept them ticking away through their final days at work, final re-packing and weighing challenges, as well as the demands of Hallowe'en (Stefanie commented, “Yup, that's all that was missing.”) had by now left them and with assurance from me that we are alive and happy, they were ready to lie down and sleep.
Unfortunately for all of us, most of the first conversation was taken up addressing a computer issue. Think of it: on the other side of the world and at considerable expense, Greg invoked his trouble-shooting skills so we could all communicate. I've not used a Mac since '85 and everything looks different from my PC at home. This was much bigger issue, however. It was a network gone wonky.
This morning as we enjoying a raucous breakfast preparing for several over-lapping hockey games, the second call came: Stefanie and St. Greg (you saw those randomly placed polka dots, right?) had walked around the main streets near their Nanjing hotel and both had slept for 13hrs-plus, They were beginning to feel ready for the next phase. There was a possibility that today could have been Kaitlynn's “Gothca' Day,” however I have not heard from them so cannot confirm. Perhaps they are just too busy holding their little daughter close, to write.
The three boyos are very active. I didn't have any boys so these past few days have been, ...erm, life in some parallel universe? Though I know downtown Montreal well, the South Shore is uncharted territory. I got lost the first day going to and from the Space Agency where the baby stays most days and, furthermore, it takes much longer to do anything in a large, cosmopolitan city. Garbage is separated into different piles from where I live. Remember all those packing materials from the last shopping trips to Ikea? And the water taps are reversed, as they could be in Australia so I take particular care starting the hot water to bathe the guys.
Does anyone know if Zorro is allowed to sleep on the sofa or where the bathing suits are for our early morning lesson tomorrow? I'd be grateful to hear from you.
Stefanie's mom
Saturday, November 3, 2007
We are in Nanjing!
Well we made it after 30+ hours of travelling. Slept for 14 hrs or so yesterday, and last night I couldn't sleep. DH is doing just fine though.
Its beautiful in Nanjing. Very cosmopolitan, modern, lots of shops and very good prices. We went to Walmart to get diapers and we paid $3 for a pack of 16 diapers! We also found a couple of toys for Kaitlynn which we hope she will like.
Gotcha is tomorrow at 10 am, alone. The other couple that we were supposed to travel with never made it, and our guide is now on her way to meet us this afternoon (she was waiting in Shanghai to meet them while we had travelled directly from Beijing to Nanjing on Friday night). I am disappointed for Kaitlynn that she won't have a playmate while we go through this process, but we will try to find a park nearby - we appear to be in a concrete jungle, and its proving difficult to find grass! Any suggestions Karen?
Unfortunately, we won't be able to post pictures till we get back home, but I will try to keep posting every so often to let everyone know what is going on. If I can't get through, my mom will keep the posts going (good news: all children appear to still have their limbs attached and the dog is still with us, and my mom is doing a great job!)
Its beautiful in Nanjing. Very cosmopolitan, modern, lots of shops and very good prices. We went to Walmart to get diapers and we paid $3 for a pack of 16 diapers! We also found a couple of toys for Kaitlynn which we hope she will like.
Gotcha is tomorrow at 10 am, alone. The other couple that we were supposed to travel with never made it, and our guide is now on her way to meet us this afternoon (she was waiting in Shanghai to meet them while we had travelled directly from Beijing to Nanjing on Friday night). I am disappointed for Kaitlynn that she won't have a playmate while we go through this process, but we will try to find a park nearby - we appear to be in a concrete jungle, and its proving difficult to find grass! Any suggestions Karen?
Unfortunately, we won't be able to post pictures till we get back home, but I will try to keep posting every so often to let everyone know what is going on. If I can't get through, my mom will keep the posts going (good news: all children appear to still have their limbs attached and the dog is still with us, and my mom is doing a great job!)
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